March 24, 2004
Ah, yes, my feline friends, you are right to cower in terror! That roar you heard the other day was indeed the Instrument of Evil coming to life once more. That voice has been silent for so long… You thought you had conquered it, didn’t you?
Alas, no such luck for you. Yes, my lovelies, your Person enlisted a co-conspirator this weekend and now has a working vacuum cleaner. Yes, the big, nasty one that howls and gobbles kitty fur and quite possibly kitty tails as well, not the wimpy little thing that is smaller (and sometimes quieter) than you are.
Yes, that process of moving stuff out of the bedroom that you found so fascinating was a harbinger of evil. Play in the open space while you dare. Enjoy your soft, satiny carpet of fur while you can—very soon it will be returned to its original rough texture. Run, my lovelies! Seek out the farthest hidey holes you can find. The Instrument of Evil will hunt you down sooner or later, but maybe you’ll feel safe for a little while. Until, of course, the bright light of its Eye discovers you…
Oh, come on! You know I always tease you. I keep it on a tight leash—you know I won’t let it get you. I’ll even tie it up and muzzle it for you as soon as I finish making it do its job. You’ll feel better once you’ve had a chance to slap the daylights out of it, I promise!